| You’ve heard of St. Denis of France
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| He never had much for to brag on
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| You’ve heard of St. George and his lance
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| Who killed d’old heathenish dragon
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| The Saints of the Welshmen and Scot
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| Are a couple of pitiful pipers
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| And might just as well go to pot
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| When compared to the patron of vipers:
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| St. Patrick of Ireland, my dear
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| He sailed to the Emerald Isle
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| On a lump of pavin' stone mounted
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| He beat the steamboat by a mile
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| Which mighty good sailing was counted
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| Says he, «The salt water, I think
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| Has made me unmerciful thirsty;
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| So bring me a flagon to drink
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| To wash down the mullygrups, burst ye
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| Of drink that is fit for a Saint.»
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| He preached then with wonderful force
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| The ignorant natives a teaching
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| With wine washed down each discourse
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| For, says he, «I detest your dry preaching.»
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| The people in wonderment struck
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| At a pastor so pious and civil
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| Exclaimed, «We're for you, my old buck
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| And we’ll heave our blind Gods to the divil
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| Who dwells in hot water below.»
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| This finished, our worshipful man
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| Went to visit an elegant fellow
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| Whose practise each cool afternoon
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| Was to get most delightful mellow
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| That day with a barrel of beer
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| He was drinking away with abandon
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| Say’s Patrick, «It's grand to be here
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| I drank nothing to speak of since landing
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| So give me a pull from your pot.»
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| He lifted the pewter in sport
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| Believe me, I tell you, it’s no fable
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| A gallon he drank from the quart
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| And left it back full on the table
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| «A miracle!» |
| everyone cried
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| And all took a pull on the Stingo
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| They were mighty good hands at that trade
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| And they drank 'til they fell yet, by Jingo
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| The pot it still frothed o’er the brim
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| Next day said the host, «It's a fast
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| And I’ve nothing to eat but cold mutton
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| On Fridays who’d make such repast
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| Except an unmerciful glutton?»
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| Said Pat, «Stop this nonsense, I beg
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| What you tell me is nothing but gammon.»
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| When the host brought down the lamb’s leg
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| Pat ordered to turn it to salmon
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| And the leg most politely complied
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| You’ve heard, I suppose, long ago
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| How the snakes, in a manner most antic
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| He marched to the county Mayo
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| And ordered them all into the Atlantic
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| Hence never use water to drink
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| The people of Ireland determine
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| With mighty good reason, I think
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| For Patrick has filled it with vermin
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| And snakes and such other things
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| He was a fine man as you’d meet
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| From Fairhead to Kilcrumper
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| Though under the sod he is laid
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| Let’s all drink his health in a bumper
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| I wish he was here that my glass
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| He might by art magic replenish
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| But since he is not, why alas!
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| My old song must come to a finish
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| Because all the drink is gone |