| Orpheus sat gloomy in his garden shed
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| Wondering what to do
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| With a lump of wood, a piece of wire
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| And a little pot of glue
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| O Mamma O Mamma
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| He sawed at the wood with half a heart
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| And glued it top to bottom
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| He strung a wire in between
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| He was feeling something rotten
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| O Mamma O Mamma
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| Orpheus looked at his instrument
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| And he gave the wire a pluck
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| He heard a sound so beautiful
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| He gasped and said O my God
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| O Mamma O Mamma
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| He rushed inside to tell his wife
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| He went racing down the halls
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| Eurydice was still asleep in bed
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| Like a sack of cannonballs
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| O Mamma O Mamma
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| Look what I’ve made, cried Orpheus
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| And he plucked a gentle note
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| Eurydice’s eyes popped from their sockets
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| And her tongue burst through her throat
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| O Mamma O Mamma
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| O God, what have I done, he said
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| As her blood pooled in the sheets
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| But in his heart he felt a bliss
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| With which nothing could compete
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| O Mamma O Mamma
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| Orpheus went leaping through the fields
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| Strumming as hard as he did please
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| Birdies detonated in the sky
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| Bunnies dashed their brains out on the trees
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| O Mamma O Mamma
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| Orpheus strummed till his fingers bled
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| He hit a G minor 7
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| He woke up God from a deep, deep sleep
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| God was a major player in heaven
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| O Mamma O Mamma
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| God picked up a giant hammer
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| And He threw it with an thunderous yell
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| It smashed down hard on Orpheus' head
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| And knocked him down a well
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| O Mamma O Mamma
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| The well went down very deep
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| Very deep went down the well
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| The well went down so very deep
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| Well, the well went down to hell
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| O Mamma O Mamma
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| Poor Orpheus woke up with a start
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| All amongst the rotting dead
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| His lyre tacked safe under his arm
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| His brains all down his head
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| O Mamma O Mamma
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| Eurydice appeared brindled in blood
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| And she said to Orpheus
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| If you play that fucking thing down here
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| I’ll stick it up your orifice!
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| O Mamma O Mamma
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| This lyre lark is for the birds, said Orpheus
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| It’s enough to send you bats
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| Let’s stay down here, Eurydice, dear
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| And we’ll have a bunch of screaming brats
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| O Mamma O Mamma
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| Orpheus picked up his lyre for the last time
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| He was on a real low down bummer
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| And stared deep into the abyss and said
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| This one is for Mamma
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| O Mamma O Mamma
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| O Mamma O Mamma |