| Well, hello there
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| Today’s tale takes place in a small little town called New York City
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| So tiny if you blink, you might just miss it
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| But I digress
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| How 'bout you go and sit on back
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| And I’ll play you a little tune while my good buddy Jean here sings you a song
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| Heck, you may just learn a thing or two
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| It’s as cold as a witch’s tit that winter day that day
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| When I’m texting my friends
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| We have learned to meet downtown to break some bread
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| It was Ann and Vern and Mary Ann all on the thread
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| When we sat and laughed and ate and drank and hung around for hours
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| Stayed 'till after closing and we broke out our guitars
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| So for the life and love of music, bourbon, and good food
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| Took so many pictures, not to save them would be rude
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| Woke up down for sunset the next day
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| Charged my phone with all the pictures right away
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| (Ha ha, Instagram!)
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| I was so happy we could share
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| So I cropped them, builded them, tilted through them down
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| And then posted a caption
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| And please be a normal person, don’t be negative
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| We had such a great time, and then I put the name of the restaurant
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| And then, so you guys could have a similar experience if you want
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| (Your welcome!)
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| One hundred and ten people posted likes
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| And Mary Ann, Vern, and Anna all reposted thrice
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| But then some stupid dick who doesn’t know how to read
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| Typed «four roses is garbage, you already have to leave»
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| (Bitch!)
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| You don’t have to drink what’s in the picture
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| It’s a digital representation of my time
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| Unless you get your nutrients from other people’s lives
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| You don’t have to drink what’s in the picture
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| And you don’t have to eat what’s in the picture
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| Goddamnit, this is just something that I enjoyed in life
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| If you fuckin' don’t like food, then a post and here’s some nudes
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| You don’t have to eat the fuckin' picture
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| Don’t have to eat what’s in the picture
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| Ooh-ooh
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| You don’t have to eat the fuckin' picture |